Day 8 February 25 – [F] Only water to drink today
RO: The point of Catholic prayer is to put us in touch, in communion, with God. Yet for many Catholics we were never really taught how to pray, but how to repeat. // Many people don’t know how to pray the mass, they just say the mass. // Become a person of prayer. // Always put yourself in God’s holy presence: God is here. // Don’t just ask for stuff for yourself. God wants to give us Himself. The Father reveals His heart to us everytime we pray that we do His will. // Use your own words first. Start off in the mindset of coming to God using your own words. Listen twice as much as you speak.
“Neither man nor beast, neither cattle nor sheep, shall taste anything; they shall not eat, nor shall they drink water. Man and beast shall be covered with sackcloth and call loudly to God; every man shall turn from his evil way and from the violence he has in hand. Who knows, God may relent and forgive, and withhold his blazing wrath, so that we shall not perish.” When God saw by their actions how they turned from their evil way, he repented of the evil that he had threatened to do to them; he did not carry it out.
Luke 11: 29-32
While still more people gathered in the crowd, Jesus said to them, “This generation is an evil generation; it seeks a sign, but no sign will be given it, except the sign of Jonah. Just as Jonah became a sign to the Ninevites, so will the Son of Man be to this generation.
Somehow my not reading the Lenten Calendar until after I get to work is really causing issues. First thing I did today was drink orange juice. This was followed by my coffee. Which was followed by my reading “Only water to drink today” and saying “Aw crap.” I have failed yet again.
And I know I had read this one days ago and that it was coming, and at that time I told myself “You are still drinking coffee that day”. This did not have anything to do with a lack of a love of Jesus, but rather I physically need that in order to function. My brain relies on the caffeine or I will get a migraine, let alone also fall asleep. I figured God would understand, because he loves me and knows that I am otherwise trying to live for Him.
The orange juice on the other hand – that was an annoying accident. However, it did help me make it thru the rest of the day. Why? Because so many times I wanted to drink things other than water. And I don’t regularly drink anything non-water except for coffee, tea, or juice – so it wasn’t like this should be super hard. But today because I was told I could not have it I felt like I wanted it all the more – it was always on my mind “I can only drink water. I can only drink water.” Which is extra crazy because water is my go to beverage – so I usually am really content with drinking water.
I definitely missed the greater opportunity here that this fasting was meant to call me to. Every time I thought “I can only have water” I should have also reflected on Jesus’ sacrifice or how I am so very blessed to have water today as well having all kinds of drinks whenever I want them every other day. I am sure most people will remember that part of the fasting is to reflect in prayer. But today I became so consumed by my feeling of “suffering” that I only focused on my physical self and neglected my spiritual self and the whole point of why I am even doing this.
Today reminded me that I am very weak and I need God to keep me and hold me. If I can remain in Him and He in me I have everything I need. I need not food or drink of this world but the food and drink he offers in communion with Him. So obvious upon reflection but I was so blind to His message today.
Let this be my lesson: When I am feeling self-centered and like I am suffering I need to turn to God and turn it over to God. I need to invite God in and ask Him to be with me and ask Him to forgive me in my failings. In prayer I remember that He is what is important; I need His help to help me remember that turning to Him is what I need to do.
Continue to Day 9