I listened to a WAOB reflection on St. Camillus de Lellis’s life and it referenced Hezekiah’s prayer – and how his prayer was intense and then answered. A few other times recently I’ve been reminded of my infertility struggles and I thought back on how I was in a long season of intense prayer. In the end I received a beautiful answer of: “I have heard your prayer; I have seen your tears.” And in God’s time Ruthie and Mabel came along.
“Thus says the LORD: Put your house in order, for you are about to die; you shall not recover.”
He turned his face to the wall and prayed to the LORD… …And Hezekiah wept bitterly.”
“Put your house in order” – Step 1.
“Pray without ceasing” – Step 2
In reading over 2 Kings 20 there are a number of “gems” here that I wish I had read when I was experiencing my deepest needs and toughest prayers. Not only does Hezekiah pray – but he is bold enough to remind God that he (Hezekiah) has been faithful to him and has been good. (1) I don’t think I thought to ever be so bold in my prayer — but perhaps I should have! (2) In order to be so bold in your prayer you have to actually have been living a faithful and good life, keeping right with the Lord.
Prayer and righteousness aren’t just for the times of need – they are for all times. Your life should be a prayer. If you ever “get off track” realize it and “put your house in order” once again. Then return to prayer and praying unceasingly and not being discouraged that it takes a long time.
In answer to his prayers, Hezekiah is gifted 15 more years of life instead of dying. I couldn’t help but enter into that and think that if I was Hezekiah (but me + infertility) I wouldn’t be praying for myself in terms of my own life but instead to please give me children and give those 15 years to them. I don’t think I prayed like that when I was in my infertility season — but it made me emotional to have the thought now.
I was listening to November+December 2017 Fr. Mike Schmitz homilies tonight and I can’t remember if it was Jacob or Daniel or ? – but they pray for 24 days and receive no answer – but then they are visited by an angel and are told their prayer has been heard since the very beginning but evil was trying to prevent the prayer. This is encouraging! Not that there is evil and demons trying to thwart our relationship with God and prevent us from fully trusting him, but that even when you do not feel like your prayer is being heard or answered in any way – it is!
On WAOB recently one reflection on something I cannot remember now talked about evil and how demons are always at work against you – and doing what they can to prevent your relationship with God (something along those lines at least). And I was like “That’s not fair!” …Which was a gut reaction. But then intellectually I was like “Oh wait, they are pure evil, that makes sense. They don’t care at all about fairness. In fact they actively work as counter to fairness as they possible can.” So be on your guard! Spiritual Warfare is real.
You have to make an act of the will to follow God, have faith in Him, live in Him and for Him. You have to do this over and over and over and over. Evil cares not for your desire to be good – if you make a choice counter to good they dig in and work to make it even harder for you to will your will to God. “Not fair! Don’t they know how hard it is to constantly choose what is right?! Even if you intellectually know what is right to will it for yourself is not as easy as knowing it.
A reading recently was “Take my yoke upon you for my yoke is easy and my burden is light”. But actually that’s not quite it. That is how I tend to remember the Bible verse but apparently I miss some key elements. Scripture often leaves me feeling “Have I ever read these words before??!!! I know I’ve read this reading (or have had to have read it! Or have had to have heard it since I listened to The Bible in a Year)… but where did this stuff come from? Was that always in there?”
For example: Matthew 11:28-30: Jesus said: “Come to me, all you who labor and are burdened,
and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am meek and humble of heart;
and you will find rest for yourselves. For my yoke is easy, and my burden light.”
I recall “For I am meek and humble of heart” – that rings bells. But the line “learn from me” I feel like was brand new. And now it is screaming in my face like it’s the most important part! How could I ever have missed it (or forgotten it!)!”
Step 1 – Take the yoke
Step 2 – Learn from Jesus
Step 3 – Find rest
Obviously the whole “take up the yoke” and find rest is paradoxical. (Is that the word? Not sure at moment… feel free to figure out the word I want to use there if “paradoxical” isn’t it.) To take up a yoke is to work. To work is to not be at rest. But if you undertake Step 2 and learn from Jesus then you will have on the correct yoke with the correct burden – making the yoke easy and the burden light. Jesus is the only way to find rest. Also by undertaking Step 2 and existing in Step 3 you will have learned from Jesus on how to be meek and humble of heart (Step 4).
Also, “Come to me, all you who labor and are burdened”. Um yeah that’s everyone. I can’t imagine there is anyone out there who doesn’t labor or doesn’t have a burden. Is that the point of the line? Is Jesus trying to be very clear that EVERYONE is to COME TO HIM?! Gosh how can I be so dense sometimes and have to wait around for a random lightbulb to come on so I can connect the most obvious dots?
Are you unsure that Jesus is speaking to you – yes YOU! Well consider if you exist or not in the world. If you are alive then you meet the criteria – you no doubt labor and are burdened. YOU NEED JESUS! He is here for you! Jesus opens with a line where you should be shouting “Oh, that’s definitely me! What’s he gonna say next! He wants to give me rest? Yes, please! How do I get this rest? Learn from him. Take up his easy yoke and light burden??? Sure thing! That’s way better than this one I currently have on.” *SHOINK!* [remove old yoke; put on one offered by Jesus].
To be yoked to something you are under the guidance and care of someone else leading you along. You might feel like that isn’t fair – you want to be independent. “No one controls me!” But to be “controlled” and guided by Jesus keeps you with God. To want to be independent is to err. To err is to separate yourself from God and the life He wants to give you. To err is to choose a wrong yoke – even if the yoke is invisible to your eyes and you think you are yokeless know that you indeed have a yoke on – and that yoke doesn’t belong to you but you belong to it. Get out from under the wrong yoke! Take up the yoke Jesus offers – that yoke belongs to you and you belong to it. Carry that beautiful yoke and take up that beautiful burden and walk in God’s loving care.
That was a swirlwind of thoughts. Apologies that these may be disjointed and incomplete. This was a sampling of about 10 different thoughts I’ve had recently that probably should each be their own fleshed out post, but I haven’t taken any time over the last week to write – so they all kind of garble-mushed out here. But hopefully I said something meaningful and said something helpful, and perhaps (if I’m lucky) I even managed two somethings! 🙂 … So please forgive me as I’m currently just content to have gotten some thoughts down…
Give God Your Yes 